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The local news on CTV this afternoon reported that London’s Selfridges department store is selling the world’s most expensive chocolate heart. (I couldn’t find a link on CTV’s website, but the story is here. The first two paragraphs are word for word what was said on CTV.)

When I heard this from the kitchen, I had visions of extremely pure high grade cocoa carved into a large intricate masterpiece of design, perhaps with rich truffle and cream fillings. However, when I came into the living room to see it for myself, all I saw was a boring hollow cheap-looking chocolate shell that just happened to have a half-million dollar diamond ring inside.

It makes “world’s most expensive chocolate heart” a bit of a misnomer. It’s only as expensive as it is due to its having some diamonds inside. If I could get my hands on a slightly more expensive ring I could easily whip together a slightly more expensive chocolate heart and have news teams knocking down my door too. Hell, I could stick it in an oatmeal cookie and have the world’s most expensive one of those instead. If I said to somebody that I’ve put together the most expensive meal ever made they’d expect several courses of the finest cuisine put together by the world’s finest chefs, not a burnt chicken breast and a diamond ring stuffed in the mashed potatos.

I just get annoyed when someone promises quality chocolate and disappoints me. The great thing about chocolate, as opposed to wine and cars and diamond rings, is that even the highest quality specimens is only a few dollars. You can get a fine bar of 70% dark chocolate for less than $5, and it’ll be far more enjoyable than the most expensive bottle of wine. If somebody gave me a Lamborghini, I’d sell it for tuition and a chocolate bar.

My favourite to date is Isis Luxury Belgian Dark Chooclate. An expensive sounding name for $2.89 worth of chocolate. For those in the downtown Montreal area, you can pick one up at Eden, in Galleries du Parc. One square after dinner is perfect. And a word of warning—Lindt’s version of the 70% cocoa dark chocolate is the worst I’ve ever had. For a few more selections, see my page on chocolate.

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